Cunnilingus

Dear Misty, 

I recently went on a few dates with a woman and we seem to really be hitting it off. We have fooled around and kissed but we haven't had sex yet. I attempted to go down on her but she stopped me. I tried explaining why I wanted to please her but nothing was "sweet" enough. What can I do?

-- Cunnilingually Lost

Dear Lost, 

The first time I went down on a woman, there was a lot going on. We were in the midst of a threesome and I just went for it. As a woman, I feel as though, I have an advantage when it comes to pleasing other women. I was only worried for a split second about what to do and how to do it. 

The question is how do let a woman know you want her? What can you say or do to make her feel at ease? 

Maybe she doesn't like oral sex. There are people who feel that way. Some may have never experienced good oral. I know a woman whose first time involved her period and a sidewalk and mental scares. She doesn't like oral and for good reason. 

**Never talk someone into something they don't feel comfortable doing! If she says NO, it always means NO!! 

If you have established that sex is gonna happen, you have to make your partner feel comfortable. I, like everyone else, have oral fears! My biggest fear when someone gets ready to go down on me are:

1. My smell

2. Hair length (Is it too long, short or scratchy?)

3. My taste (Did I clean everything?)

4. Squirting (Should I warn the person or will that set an impossible goal?)

5. My moans (Am I moaning enough? Too much?)

You should always be honest about your feelings. Let your partner know how special she is. Try these sweet words:

1. When you want to go down on her - "May I taste you?" might be too dirty but "Is it ok if I please you?" will make her feel powerful and in control. 

2. When she gets undressed - "You are absolutely, astoundingly gorgeous and that's the least interesting thing about you." 

3. When you're kissing your way to her sweet spot- "You smell like heaven"

4. While kissing her lips (not the ones on her face) - Moaning is always a good thing to hear. 

5. After she cums - say "Thank you" with a smile.  

If she doesn't return the favor, it's ok. It takes time to be comfortable with who you are and what you find pleasurable. Never give to receive, that will only create resentment! Oral is something to be shared, it's about intimacy! 

I hope this is helpful and I hope you're able to give her the face ride of her life. Remember, we can be afraid during a new experience, so trust and comfort are key!

Misty

My accidental threesome

My first threesome was an accident, my second one was too. I'm a go with the flow type person and twice in my life, the flow went to threesome. If I could plan the perfect threesome, it would involve me twice and my partner or me and two professional pornstars. In my first threesome, it was two men and me. One was more attractive, better endowed and spoke great English. (I was living in China.) The other guy was mediocre overall. He looked ok, he wasn't huge and he wasn't winning awards in bed. The threesome happened by accident. I was a guest of mediocre guy in their hotel room after a night of club hopping. He seemed really into me and I hadn't had sex in a month, so I figured why not. After more drinking and waiting for his friend (hottie) to fall asleep, we had ok sex. He left me to take a shower after 15 minutes of mediocrity. While he was in the shower, hottie "woke up" and confessed that he wanted me and he wasn't actually sleep, he was just waiting. I was very attracted to him and I confessed that too. We wanted each other but I was afraid of a fight breaking out. So I consented to quiet sex with him while MG was in shower. Of course HG had great penis and knew how to use it. The sex lasted a lot longer than with MG. So long that MG was out of the shower and watching us. 

I was nervous because I know how the male ego can be. But I guess MG figured, he could sulk or he could join. It was a bit overwhelming to say the least. I am a moaner and a curser in bed. If you get me going the right way, I'm loud and you don't know if I love it or hate it. On the other end, I also fake it sometimes. So when HG would be inside me, my body and mouth would react. When MG was inside me, I'd have to fake it. I had to think about my moaning levels the entire time. I didn't want anyone's feelings hurt or egos bruised. I didn't want it to be a competition but that's ultimately what most guys turn it into. I also had a lot to concentrate on. I had to focus on blowing one guy and having sex with the other. If you're not careful, you could pinch a nerve or pull a muscle. 

I watch more porn than I should and I find gangbangs and threesomes sexy. But those are professionals! Not only do they get paid to do it but they practice it. They know how to make the woman comfortable and it's not a race to see who can finish first or who can thrust hardest. After a couple of hours, I was sore from ineptitude and tried to sleep. Every time I went to the bathroom to pee, MG would be ready to go again. These times it was just me and him. By 7am I gathered my clothes, made an excuse and did the walk of shame back to my apartment. I'm sure I looked terrible stumbling past Chinese school kids while the sun was coming up. 

The moral of the story: Always carry extra clothes so that you don't scare school children. And first times are almost always awkward. Although so was my second time but that's another story for another time.

A Rave from Craigslist

Thank you stranger! (Around the way)

Posted July 29,2014

Dear stranger,
I would like to thank you for answering my ad, coming over, and making me orgasm hard. I am "exclusive" with man who likes to have sex once in a while. When I've asked for round 2 or 3, he says we already had sex. He also seems shocked and disappointed that orgasms are supposed to be for everyone. Maybe he thinks if I don't get off, I can't get pregnant. Or if I get off, my vagina will turn into a vacuum. I'm not sure. I'm not asking him to bury his face in me for hours.
Stranger, you made me cum in 15 minutes! That's never happened to me before! I thought I was broken. But it was just another case of selfish lover!
So thank you strangers of Craigslist who get girls off and are surprised to when neglected women reciprocate! Yes I swallow but it'll be a reward for me actually getting off now!
Sincerely,
I'm inspired by your generosity!!